New from Army Goddess (I like that)

23 NOV

On Tuesday we practiced land navigation. They took us out to the woods and give us a list of six spots that we had to use our maps, compasses and protractors to find. Our team found every spot that we had to find. The guys went to two wrong spots before they would listen to me, but I finally got them to pay attention, and then we made a really good team. It was snowing and sleeting while we did this. We had our wet weather tops on, and that kept up half dry, but our legs were soaked. We ate lunch on the ground in the freezing rain.

We took a long march yesterday, maybe 3 miles. We had to carry our heavy rucksacks and wear our helmets and carry our guns. Of the four platoons in our company, ours was the only one that didn't have anybody who couldn't make the whole march. Every other platoon had people fall way back into the other one behind it, or even have to ride the truck for a while.

We're in a class to check our gas masks for defects and how to use it. This shit is scary.

I'm doing okay as a squad leader. They don't listen to me all the time, but I think they're (mostly) understanding that I just want the best for everybody. I think they're also noticing the extra stuff we have to do, like account for everybody in our squad, make sure everybody is squared away with all their gear, etc.

We have 3 DS's - DS Hulsey is THE platoon Sergeant, and Dickerson & Barstow are under him. DSH is the toughest, and some of the girls call him Major Payne. They say DSB look & talks like Vin Diesel, and DSD doesn't have a nickname. ... I lead the right side of the road march, and did fine keeping up with the pace. About halfway through it yesterday, he told me that "junior would be proud of me." I made sure to show him Lane's pictures, and he took the time to ask what company Lane was in here, and what his MOS was. Usually the DS's don't discuss anything personal. I have to admit that I got choked up when he said what he did on the road march, thinking about Lane graduating that day.

25 Nov

We moved to UAC (now MAC) - Unarmed or Modern Army Combatives -- wrestling. We practied each move in buddy teams -- we took a lunch break, then went back out for more. About mid-afternoon, we started the real stuff, wrestling each other to get 2 champions per platoon. DSB started by asking if anybody in the platoon didn't like anybody. A few of us raised our hands, including me, and he called me first, and told me to name the person. Oh, crap, I didn't expect to have to make a full show of it in front of the whole platoon. The girls know who doesn't get along, of course, but I didn't see any reason to air it out in front of the guys too. I'd just figured he'd make a short speech about, "this is the time to get it out, yada yada," but I put myself in the center of the ring and point to the girl who was the mouthiest and most disrespectful and resentful. She talked all night about how she was going to whip half the platoon's ass today, and she's a big, strong girl. I full expected her to rub me into the ground. She ended up tapping out because she got so winded that she couldn't breathe, and DS wouldn't let me give her a break so she could catch her breath.

When we got back to the bay, she made a point of announcing that I'd earned her respect, both by being willing to be up-front and call her out, and by out-lasting her.

The combat was marred a few rounds later, though, when a boy broke his leg. All of their moves were almost text-book, but he planted wrong and both boys went back on his one leg. I don't think he even noticed it at first, he had so much adreneline going. He asked the DS if his bone was sticking out -- the DS said, "Do you really want to know?" Yes, it was. The CPT called the ambulance, and they made us move our circle to another spot and keep going. Some fo the girls were upset -- they didn't think we should keep going, both because it was "too dangerous" and because they thought it was disrepectful to the injured boy. I told them that some of these kids would have to see their buddies shot or blown up and be able to complete the mission, so carrying on was exactly what they had to do.

We hear a lot of "but this is only training, we shouldn't have to do this in the sleet/full force/ sleep deprived, etc. There's also a lot of, "the only danger I'll ever be in is from a paper cut. I won't need this for my MOS." That's a very disappointing view of life in general.

We're not supposed to use "girl" or "boy." We are all soldiers, and, if necessary, "male" and "female." I enjoy being a "girl" though -- one of the girls, your girl, way-to-go-girl. I'm enjoying the hell out of being a soldier, too. Maybe I won't need the combat-oriented training (the reality is, of course, that I may), but in my job esp., I'll need to understand all soldiers' frame of reference and what they have to face, and how they have to perform.

A lot of females are regretting their decision. There's so much focus on Exodus [the term for the Christmas break], wanting to go home for break, how many days until we leave. I'm glad that I'll get to be with you guys before 9 weeks is over, but I really think the break in training is detrimental to morale. People aren't focused on graduation and Victory Forge, just getting away for that two week break. I miss you terriby, but I know that this separation is of our own choosing, and we are working towards goals that you and I set together. I'm focused on doing the best I can in this short time here, and succeeding, not all that I'm missing at home.

....

Tell Tony I sure do have balls, and they're getting tougher and bolder every day. In class one day, DSH asked for a volunteer to read the screen in a loud voice. I had my hand up before he embellished, "a deep, loud voice." He cocked his head and rolled his eyes at me, and I stuck my hand up further, so he told me to get up -- I rang out, loud and clear, everybody heard me. I'm definitely holding my own.